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आजकल ब्लॉग लिखे में स्वतंत्रता नही है। कुछ लोग टिपण्णी लिखते हैं मेरे पोस्ट पे। ये मुझे अच्छा लगता है, धन्यवाद! लेकिन उसके साथ ही साथ अब मुझे लगने लगा है की कुछ ऐसा लिखूं जिसपे कुछ न कुछ टिपृपणी ज़रूर आए। तो मूलभूत रूप से अब में अपने नही, अपितु दूसरों के लिए लिखने की कोशिश करता हुआ स्वयं को पाता हूँ। यह सही नही है।
यह अजीब बात है की मैंने ज्यादा लोगों को अपने ब्लॉग के बारे में नही बताया है, मेरे ख़याल से १-२ को छोड़ के सबने अपने आप ही इसे मेरी ऑरकुट profile या पता नही कहाँ से खोजा है, और ये बात भी मेरे को ठीक लगती है। क्यूंकि मैंने शुरुवात इसी ख्याल से की थी की कोई अपने आप पढ़े तो ठीक लेकिन मैं किसी को इसके बारे में नही बताऊँगा … ताकि मैं अपने लिए लिखूं। ” Arts for Arts Sake” ।
अगर मैं अपने को अभिव्यक्त करने की आज़ादी चाहता हूँ, तो लोगों के विचार सुनने की आकांशा रुपी मोहपाश से स्वयं को मुक्त करना पड़ेगा।
Category: Uncategorized
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दीवार के सहारे बैठे हुए,जब
मैं कुछ कहते कहते रुक जाता हूँ,
पूछती है मुझसे,
“क्या सोच रहा है,
कहाँ खो गया है ?”
और आंखों में देखते हुए,मेरे
जवाब का इंतज़ार करती है
तब उन लम्हों में,
चुप हो जाता हूँ,
कुछ बहकता हूँ, मैं कुछ खो जाता हूँ।
और उसे कुछ समझ नही आता॥
चेहरे पे उसके उलझन देख,
” अरे ऐसे ही यार! कुछ नही”, मैं हँसता हूँ
वो मुस्कुराती है,
और मैं कुछ और चुप हो जाता हूँ…..
Category: Uncategorized
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क्या करें और कहाँ जाएँ?
क्या रात को सवेरे में तब्दील होते हुए,
पूर्वोत्तर कि ओर तकते जाएँ?
क्या जेहन में छुपे हुए गम को,
मुस्कुराहटों के झूठ में डुबोते जाएँ?
दुपहर मिल कर भी उनसे,
शाम को अनजाने होते जाएँ?
रिश्ता अजीब है ये ‘स्वतंत्र’,
चाहे नाम हज़ार देते जाएँ…
Category: Emotion, Uncategorized, futility, poem
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♂ “Bye”
♀ “What’s that?”
♂ “Kya ‘what’s that?’”
♀ “I mean, that’s not the way to say goodbye!”
♂ “Really? Then what is?”
♀ “You first make a context, then taper off the conversation, and finally say ‘bye’ as a fitting finish”
♂ “Duh??”
♀ “Arre, look at me. I ask how’s the weather, then I talk about….”
♂ (Interrupting) “Hey wait a minute! We already discussed about the weather in Mumbai”
♀ (Gives me an exasperated sigh) “OK. So talk about a movie, about parents, about a collegue”
♂ “There is no interesting Hindi movie going on, nothing happens in my parents lives, My dog is too dumb to be talked about & you know how bad I am at gossiping about people”
♀ “your IQ might be 170, but your EQ is surely in single digit”
♂ “Umm… I don’t know”
♀ “You’re Stupid. Chow!”
♂ “that’s ‘Chow’ all right but that isn’t Ciao.”
♀ “what do u mean its chow but not chow”
♂ “I mean its C-I-A-O but pronounced as Chow, Italian you know”
♀ (blushes) “oh! hi hi …you know my spellings na”
♂ “by my superior IQ I have just calculated that this phone call has already costed you Rs 43 and if we didn’t have this last piece of conversation, you would have saved Rs 5..”
♀ “click”
(call ended)
♂ (To myself) “That’s the secret of the art of saying goodbye”
Category: English, Humor, Uncategorized, sweetness
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गणित पढ़ते पढाते सहसा लगा कि आदमी कि उपलब्धि ये नही है कि वो विज्ञान में कितना आगे निकल आया है। ऐसा नही कि मुझे वैज्ञानिकों के आविष्कारों पे आश्चर्य न हो। वो निश्चित रूप से मानवीय आकांषा कि एक सफल प्रतिमूर्ति है, किंतु विज्ञान प्रकृति में विद्यमान सूत्रों कि खोज ही तो है! 2+2=4 हमेशा रहा है। गुरुत्वाकर्षण newton से पहले भी था, और बाद में भी रहेगा। अगर newton न होता, तब भी वो रहता। विज्ञान सत्य कि एक खोज है …बस इससे आगे कुछ नही।
कला (Art) एक बिल्कुल अलग चीज़ है। वो आदमी कि कृति है। वो आदमी है जिसने इतने सुंदर रंगों से चित्रकला बनी है, जिसने सात सुरों से करोड़ों गाने बनायें हैं, जिसने पत्थर तराश तराश कर अजन्ता - एलोरा बनायें हैं, जिसने भाषा का आविष्कार किया है।असली आविष्कार वही हैं जो मनुष्य ने अपने मनुष्य होने कि वजह से बनायें हैं। कैसे आदमी ने इतने सुंदर शिल्प बनायें हैं! इंसान ने अपने आस पास कि दुनिया को अगर कुछ दिया है तो वो केवल कला के नमूने हैं। केवल वही एक ऐसी चीज़ है, जिसमे हमने प्रकृति में कुछ जोडा है।
बाकी सब ( मशीन, बिजली, विलास-वस्तु) तो वही पानी, मिटटी और आकाश का खेल है जिसे मूर्ख मनुष्य अपनी सरंचना सोच के इतराता है और जिसपे सृष्टि मंद मंद मुस्काती है!
—–
“बावरे से इस जहाँ में,
बावरा एक साथ हो,
इस सायानी भीड में,
बस हाथों में तेरा हाथ हो,
बावरी सी धुन हो कोई,
बावरा एक राग हो,
बावरे से पैर चाहें,
बावरे तरानो के,
बावरे से बोल पे थिरकना।
बावरा मन देखने चला एक सपना। ”
- स्वानंद किरकिरे
Category: Uncategorized
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I can’t see the end of me
My whole expanse I cannot see
I formulate infinity
And store it deep inside of me
http://www.esnips.com/doc/a8773fdc-4859-4f9d-87f2-29d480daead1/Nirvana+-+Oh+Me
Category: Uncategorized
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ESNIPS पे “हम लायें हैं तूफ़ान से किश्ती निकाल के ….” गाना सुनते हुए याद आया कि छब्बीस जनवरी पास आ गयी है। याद आया कि फिर से स्कूली बच्चों को जबरदस्ती राजपथ ले जाया जाएगा और मैं ख़ुशी ख़ुशी सोचूंगा कि चलो एक छुट्टी और मिली।
तभी याद आया कि मेरे दादाजी (बाबा) और दादीजी (अम्मू) भी शामिल थे स्वतंत्रता सेनानियों में और अनगिनित गांधीवादियों कि तरह उनके भी जेल जान पड़ा था। दोनो कि तबियत भी काफी खराब हुई थी उस दौरान। बाबा और अम्मू दोनो ही संपन्न परिवारों से ताल्लुक रखते थे और उन्हें कोई आवश्यकता नही थी अपने स्निग्ध जीवनशैली त्याग के ,जेल के एक बैरक में बासी रोटी और अधपकी दाल खाने की। लेकिन उन्होने ऐसा किया, कुछ अपनी पीढ़ी के लिए, कुछ मेरी पीढ़ी के लिए और कुछ मेरी आने वाले पीढियों के लिए।
बाबा अब नही रहे, अम्मू से अगर पूछों कि आपने क्यों इतना त्याग किया तो वो कहेंगी कि उस समय का उन्माद ऐसा ही था। वे कहेंगी कि कुछ इतनी बड़ी बात भी नही थी। किन्तु जिस चीज़ के लिए आपने इतनी मेहनत की, उस की कीमत हम में से कोई न समझा।
एक PEPSI पीते , McD का burger खाते और GRE देके पहले मौक़े में अमरीका जाते हुए आपके अयोग्य पौत्र की ओर से शत् शत् नमन .
Category: Emotion, Uncategorized, ambition, futility, learning, past, present, sweetness
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इंग्लिश में गाना पढ़ने से मूड खराब हो जाता है…. पेश है देवनागरी में इस सुन्दर गाने ke शब्द ….
मनोरमा 6 FEET UNDER
तेरे सवालों के वो जवाब जो मैं दे न दे ना सकूँ - 4
पिघले से अरमान है , दो पल के मेहमाँ हैं
आँखों के आलों में, चाहत की लौ जलने दो
तेरे सवालों के वो जवाब जो मैं दे न दे ना सकूँ- 2
(कह रही है जो नज़र तुझे है ख़बर के नही कह रही है तेरी नज़र तू बेखबर तो नही) - 2
तेरे बिना जिंदगी है अधूरी , तेरे बिना क्या है जीना
पिघले से अरमान है , दो पल के मेहमाँ है
आंखों के आलों में, चाहत की लौ जलने दो
(तुम कहो तो मैं रोक लूँ , jo तुम कहो तो नही
सीने में है कैसी खलिश , तेरी कशिश तो नही ) - 2
तेरे बिना जिंदगी है अधूरी , तेरे बिना क्या है जीना
पिघले से अरमान है , दो पल के मेहमाँ है
आंखों के आलों में, चाहत की लौ जलने दो
तेरे सवालों के वो जवाब जो मैं दे न दे ना सकूँ - 2
तेरे बिना जिंदगी है अधूरी , तेरे बिना क्या है जीना
Category: Lyrics, Uncategorized
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Students -
1) Rahul Newar - The true bond.
2) Neelesh sachdeva - The only person who has everything that i’m impressed by. Studies, Intelligence, People skills, Carefree, Down to earth & helpful
3) Naval Goel - The only person who knows finance in IIFT. The only person who is unaffected by what people say. The only person whose transformation impresses & inspires me.
4) Chango - He’s Smart, he’s ambitious , he’s pragmatic & he networks like anything. If he’s your friend, you know he’ll be there when you need him.
Professors -
1) Deepak Chawla - for developing a passion for Stats in me.
2) P. Bhaumik - The only teacher who taught me ‘why’ of mathematics. The only teacher who instilled confidence in me that I too can understand mathematics.The only teacher who made me believe in my intellectual capabilities.
Administration -
1) Gaurav Gulati - For proving that rules are meant to help you, not hinder.
Support Staff
1) Ramnivas Ji - for having a smile on his face even while dealing with so many irritating situations.
Category: Emotion, English, Uncategorized, education
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I’m in love with this band. The music is simply awesome. “Meloncholic Ecstacy” fills me with a spectrum of emotions. If you still haven’t heard it, do that right now!
Just read that they’e coming to delhi…Date: December 1
Venue: SAARC Band Festival, Central Park CP, New Delhi
Time: 8.30 P.M.
Tickets: Entry Free…
Whoa! am going there….
Sharma Ji, wish you were here!
Category: Uncategorized
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Hari told me today that placements are very important because they will determine where we’ll finally end up in our lives and are thus a make or break thing.
I don’t think so. Looking back at my short 24 yr old life, I think that at each point there were aways some pressing problems which we thought were make or break. Remember the class X board? or class XII ones? or some exams at resonance or even IIT JEE? They all were damn impat that time but now i don’t think so. there are new opportunities today which have taken that mindspace.
The leitmotif of make or break still exists although. And it always will. For remember there is no true happiness ,only ‘In pursuit of happiness’
——–
PS : Congrats Ruhani ! 
Category: English, Uncategorized, ambition, education
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कौन मूरख़ है? क्या वो जो धीरे सोचता है , या वो जो धीमे काम करता है, या वो जो पढाई अथवा खेल-कूद में पिछड़ा है?क्या वो जो अजीब सवाल पूछता है या वो जो अजीब बातें करता है ,या फिर वो जिसका काटने में सबसे अधिक आनंद आता है?
कहना मुश्किल है ! लेकिन ज़रा सोच के देखिये, हम सब जीवन के किसी न किसी मोड़ पे, कुछ मूर्ख़ता नही करते है? एक सवाल उभरता है…. क्या हम सब, किसी न किसी की नज़रों में मूर्ख नही हैं?
हमे क्या अधिकार है की किसी का मजाक उडायें ? हमे क्या अधिकार है की किसी और की बुराई करें ? ख़ुद में कभी झांक कर तो देखे की आखर हम कौन बड़ी तोप है जो दूसरे को गधा कहे!
फुददु वो है जो अपने को दूध का धुला समझे और सोचे की उससे बेहतर व्यक्ति नज़र नही आता. नज़र उठा के देख आदम!! हर वो चीज़ जो मै करता हूँ, मुझसे १०० गुना बेहतर कोई और कर सकता है, और हर वो चीज़ जिसपे तुम इतराओ , उससे १०० गुना वोही किसी और के पास भी हो
“बना है शाह का मुसाहिब , फिरे है इतराता
वरना शहर में गालिब की आबरू क्या है “
Category: Emotion, Uncategorized, ambition, education, past, present
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Ok. So I came all the way back from Delhi to take the CFA exam in Bombay on June 3, 2007. so what if the useless trip cost me 12,000 bucks. It was well worth the efforts, time and money…. Or was it?
Ummm… may be not. this exam was different. .. Chalo let me start from the beginning
I landed at Mumbai airport after flying through beautiful clouds aboard an Indian airlines flight. People say that their service is poor; however it was much better than Go air. Anyways, I had a window seat and for the first time was in an airplane while being in midst of a storm. The plane was shaking violently and was bumping too… seemed more of being in a bus from Kota to Ajmer rather than in a plane from del to bom.
Anyways, after a 45 min delay I landed at Mumbai airport at about 8 PM. I had already made my boarding arrangements at 3 places. So I went to NITIE because it was closest to the test centre at Thakur Engg college at Kandivili. I got a room on 7th floor, number 707. it seemed as if the airplane thing was just not leaving me. There the room was in a mess and no pillows or bed sheets were provided. So I borrowed a bed sheet from shriharsha which I eventually used as a pillow because I didn’t want the sleep to be a pain in the neck (pun intended)
When I landed in NITIE, Chandan told me that PPO decision is due on Tuesday. Now I already know what skimpy chance do I have at a PPO so it didn’t bother me much. However there was, and is, a small feeling that ….. Chalo, let’s leave that for a moment.
So I borrowed an alarm clock. I set multiple alarms just to make sure that I don’t forget to wake up in the morning. . I studied a bit of GIPS and asset valuation before I slept at 11 30.
I woke up at 5 30 AM. But then I thought “ki agar life mein neend nahi poori ki to kya kiya?”. So I slept for an hour more and woke up at 6 30 AM out of sheer tension. Then quickly got ready and was set to leave for the exam.
A break here— at this point I must state that NITIE campus is very beautiful. I liked it very much, about the same as PEC.
Haan to as I was saying, when I was going out of the hostel I found a few guys all ready like me. I guessed immediately that they too were CFA candidates. Since there was only one centre at Bombay, my baniya buddhi thought it better to share an auto (read cut my operating expenses by half). So I sat with this padhakoo looking guy. The route from NITIE to kandivili was very beautiful. It was a cloudy day and that really cheered me up. In fact it was so beautiful that I really had a doubt that this place was in Bombay. Chalo koi na, I finally reached thakur’s at about 7 50 AM.
There were lots of people at the centre. Around 2000 may be. There were a quite a few sexy looking chicks too, which busted my myth of finance being a male dominated area.
Jo bhi ho, the centre was very well managed. Invigilators were wearing a seemingly bulletproof yellow top up shirt which reminded me of a parrot. I asked one of them why was it like that and she told me it’s CFA policy. I though that the CFA institute makes people work like an ass and look like a parrot… what are they somehow affiliated to PeTA? But then I just shrugged off the feeling and continued my observations at the firagi test centre. There were big posters of Cell phones not allowed and Laptops/ PC’s not allowed all over the place. They were printed on pretty decent paper and I wondered how much would have this bullshit cost them. But with all that $845 fees, they can spend money on things like that I guess.
So then I went inside the centre where they repeatedly checked my hall ticket and Passport. They’re pretty touchy on these issues yaar. So then they gave us a very well printed exam booklet and OMR sheet and read the instructions aloud. The test began at sharp 9 AM according to the 30 Rs digital ‘hello kitty’ watch that I purchased from Dwarka.
I started with Portfolio Mgmt . there were 6 qns and I did not know answer to 1. CML and SML were heavily tested material. I then moved to asset valuation. But I found that tough and in the mid section went to economics which I again found tough. There were some qns on monetary policy effects on currency appreciation that I’m sure I did bad in. I next moved to Quant which was ok types and to Ethics which were fine. Then I went back to asset valuation before finally doing Financial statement analysis, which as again OK.
So in essence, asset valuation was tough and other sections were fine… but I din’t have that ‘phod diya’ feeling in AM test.
BUT I finished the test 1hour before .
Then there was a break for 2 hours where I had a very oily chola bhatura and a fag. This guy from ICFAI was also smoking and I cursed his institute a bit. He was curious about IIFT and I gave him general gyaan.
I met a few of my college seniors also during the exam
Then came the afternoon session.
This section was easier. I started with portfolio mgmt again which was just OK types. Lots of CML/SML qns again. Then I moved to asset valuation which I found easy. As I was a bit confidant, I moved to FSA which again was easy. Nest I went to Economics which was cool . Then was Quant which I think I cracked. Last was ethich where again I did well.
Overall paper was easy But tricky. Also lots of ‘ratta’ is required. Theory is big time important. Even quant had theory in it.
So in essence, AM was bad and PM was good. However, because AM was Quite bad, I’m 80% sure I’ll pass. Ok may be 90% but definitely not 100%
Out of 240 qns I did not know/got confused in 54 qns.
Assuming I knew the answers at this much correct of level, my score is
70%level 75%level 80% level 83%level 85% level
sure 186 130.2 139.5 148.8 154.38 158.1
unsure 54 13.5 13.5 13.5 13.5 13.5
Total 143.7 153 162.3 167.88 171.6
% 59.875 63.75 67.625 69.95 71.5
at most I can get 74% approx
Most probably I’ll get 68% types. So that’s it. I’m borderline case in this exam
Category: CFA, Emotion, English, Finance & Economics, Uncategorized
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“A walk in the village of Gularbhoj, Uttaranchal”
(1 weekend +fri/mon Between 15-30 june,2007)
(1 weekend +fri/mon Between 15-30 june,2007)
A 3/ 4 day rejuvenation camp in company of PEC friends
Hey!!
Are you, yes you: I mean the guy reading this mail, tired of a boring stay at NCR?
Are you frustrated with your routine ?
Do you feel that your company considers you as just an extension of the computer?
Or do you remember the bygones?
Or do you miss Varun Agrawal(not agarwal/not aggarwal)’s company?
Or do you think that you require a break from this !@#$ life of yours??
Or ummm…am running out of ideas..just substitute one here.
If yes!!!
Then we have got the perfect plan for you!!!
Join us at the special village tour at village gularbhoj, District Udham singh nagar, Uttaranchal
Just 6 hours from Delhi by bus (200 KMS)
Exclusivity :
- no peeping/irritating fellow travelers
- Good-Old-days feeling
- Limited seats ( only PEC- electrical 2006 friends of 02459 eligible)
- Exclusive friend list
Sharma Ji (the boss)
GG : the himesh Reshamiya
RG: the kamaal friend
Raman Arya & his brother : His excellancy, The prince(s) of Narwana
Avneet : our gumshuda friend
Bajad: does he need an introduction??
Special Attraction : BBBBBUUUUDDDDYYYYYY ( Er Parmeet Singh)
( the I’m-coming-on-so – u – better-get-d-party-started Sensation!!!) - NO CAREER DISCUSSIONS AT ALL
- A walk in the village bazaar
- A ride in tractor
- A ‘swim’ in the tube well
- A picnic on the river
- A walk on the dam
- A trip to Nainital
- Roaming on Nainital streets
- (if possible) Adventure sports in Rishikesh
- Meeting with Mr Varun Agrawal(not agarwal/not aggarwal)’s grandmother who knows all
- the guests.( especially Navu & Bajad)
- Ghar ka khaana
- Walk on village streets that lead to nowhere
- Ride in the Indian railways amidst the last remains of a jungle
- Bajad & boss’s witty remarks
- Varun Agrawal’s (not agarwal/not aggarwal) PJ’s
- Kite flying
- Watching the 1000’s of firefly(Jugnu)* …..(subject to availability)
- Star Gazing— Real stars,not city lights/pg 3 people
- Playing with the dog if he doesn’t bite you
- Etc etc etc
However please note: Following activities are banned!!!!!
· Being in a sullen mood
· Talking about IT life
· Not mixing with other guests
· not being cheerful
· PEC-LANGUAGE ( YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN *&@#) in villageRULES AND REGULATIONS ARE SUBJECT TO CHANGE WITHOUT NOTICE
Varun Agrawal
Mumbai contact number : 9833847216
Varun.pec@gmail.com
Category: English, Uncategorized
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Whoa! Life has changed so much after my guide returned. Suddenly I find myself amidst loads of work. I have to work till 7:30 , 6 days a week.
Apparently my guide got a shouting from the bosses in Europe over the plans which he had. My boss’s boss was also telling him, “ Your plans are bullshit … absolute bullshit Doc” . Now that he has to perform, he has told me to buckle up. Now my project will involve loads of traveling and ‘sir-khapai’. After all He has to deliver, and I have to do the work. How logical.
So now here I am, enroute my way to Ambala & Solan. Trying to figure out all about mushrooms. Reminds me of that sub-edible mushroom-mutter that we used to get in PEC.. yaad hai? Those were the days when we would just go to mezbaan-11 and dine to our hearts content in 70 rupees. In Bombay saala a ‘bhutta’ costs 25/- . washing a shirt costs 15/- . washing a pant costs 25/-. 1 dozen of mangoes cost 250 Rs et al.
And amidst all this workload is the CFA exam on june 3. 25 days more. And now I’m ready to press the panic button. Thank god that I have completed the syllabus so I know that I’ll be able to revise it. Had I not, would have been dead turkey by now.
Category: English, Uncategorized, education, futility, learning, past
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The fact that I’m writing this piece proves I have been able to survive the 89% humidity levels and the rotten-fish-stench of the Bombay climate. Thank you god that you had sent me to Kota where I was accustomed to all un-inhabitable conditions that humans could stand and am reaping(read sweating) that benefit now.
My project in company is in a mess. My guide has gone to EU to negotiate business while I am left here trying to figure out some way to supplement Unilever’s coffers with yet more riches. My work involves sourcing agricultural raw materials for Unilever worldwide from India. Am working on saffron & Walnuts now and might have to travel to Kashmir for them. After all 98% of these products are in Kashmir. To be specific, 100% of saffron is in pulwama district and 98% walnuts are in Anantnag & Doda district. I have stated to appreciate the stereotypical American Doper’s comment, “Peace man!!”
Anyways, now that I have merrily wasted my time(emptied the coffee machine/surfed the internet/eating Parle G) in office thinking about ‘innovative’ ideas to save moolah on RM, I now dread what if my guide , on coming back from the EU trip, asks what Bajad’s boss asked him, “sow(show) me the money, sow me the money!”
So one day I went to Bandra Bandstand. At 8 PM when I was going there, a policewallah stopped me and asked, “ Where is the girl?”. I answered that I don’t have a girl. At this he replied that I’m not allowed to visit the beach if I don’t have a ‘ladki’.. WTF..man I’m moving towards another spell of depression……..
Category: English, Uncategorized, past
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Decadence is setting in. My ideas & ethics are dying and am everyday getting more and more materialistic.
A number of thoghts cross my mind everyday. This is an attempt to word my emotions on a gamut of things.
If you’re here to find some fun stuff, you’ll be dissapointed. This is meant to be more of a chronicle rather than an intellectual/entertainment portal!
However, if you’re here to see what have i been up to; you’re more than welcome.
Category: CFA, Dev D, Dhol yaara Dhol, Emotion, English, Finance & Economics, Humor, InterviewI, Lyrics, MFE, Nature, Oxford, PEC, Uncategorized, ambition, confusion, crap videos, education, futility, learning, love, movie review, past, poem, present, sweetness, teaching, work satisfaction
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